Uplifting..

There are people in my life that make me want to live. They save me from myself and the tortures I have to face on a daily basis. There were so many times when I've doubted everything, times when I questioned everything, and times where I didn't even have the energy to move, to think, to feel. And everytime, I am blessed to say, someone has picked me up. My friends, my family, someone, anyone, would walk in and help me to notice them and their beliefs. As they do so, as they show me themselves and how they love me, I see beauty, I see deep love and affection, and I see a reason to start smiling.

But as much as one can stand by you and advise you about the situation you're in, I know that the only person that heals you, that saves you, is you. For only you have the power to do so. No one is a victim of circumstance unless they allow themselves to be.

Do not misunderstand me, and think you don't need these people- as much you can uplift yourself alone, you often need someone to clear the fog in your mind and give you start. A boost. A reason.

For me that reason is love. Love and astonishing beauty. The kind that exists beyond bodies of earth. The type that you can only observe deep within an incredibly good soul. And once I recognise its existance inside my friend or family, this material, corrupt, cruel society seems minute to the board spectrum of love that I could contain.

Once I start feeling again, that ray of sunlight softly encourages me to love, love, and love some more, and soon I begin to remember who I am, and just how much I love to love.

Hating and blaming, in this life, brings nothing but even more pain and emptiness. One can get so engrossed in the cause of a loss, that it completely prevents you from living, loving and embracing your true self. I've come to realise that even though it's difficult at times, forgiving someone is often the best cure for you.

Yajna Ramdass
20/04/09

Imperfect Divine

I want to know you..
I want to know your eyes when they first open, as they explore mine at the start of a new day.
I want to know your first smile in the morning.. And the last before bed.
I want to know what makes your heart sing and your mind dance.
I want to know what uplifts you beyond the clouds and what holds you tightly to the earth.
I want to know what your favourite colour is and what music speaks to your soul.
I want to know what type of jokes makes you laugh and what type of movies you'd spend days watching.
I want to know if you love to read and which stories will never leave you.
I want to know how you express yourself, do you find words, shapes or colours to fill your emotions?
I want to know your moments of love and it's astounding ecstacy.
I want to know how you love and who.
But more importantly that than happiness, i want to know your darkness.
I want to know the sadness that droops your eyelids and leaves that distant longing in your eyes.
I want to know your coldest thought and your most terrifying dreams.
I want to know your weaknesses and how you found your strength.
I want to know why your so afraid and why you hold so many defenses.
I want to know what makes you tear and what makes you thankful.
I want to know what makes you doubt, what makes you ache, what makes you cry.
I want to know how you think and what you believe to be true.
I want to know you, not just your body and your likes and dislikes, but you.
I want to know how the universe you've created, surrounds you, and i want to know at the end of it all, what makes your heart beat a little softer or a little harder..
I want to know you.
Just you.
Imperfect divine.
So don't you see?
It was never a question of dating, it was never a question of where we'll end up, but it was always an opportunity to share yourself, and for once, for me to really know you as you learn of me.

Yajna Ramdass
17/04/09